Planning a Gender Workshop

So my co-officers of Trans* Parachute United and I are currently planning a gender workshop for this coming Sunday, and I’m actually really excited. We have some great ideas for it, and I really hope that we can pull the execution off.

Originally, we started planning a simple panel, with people speaking about themselves and their personal experiences, like most panels at Juniata run. After about ten minutes, though, we realized we had the beginnings of an educational workshop on our hands, and we just ran with it. It’s caused some unnecessary stress, but I think we have something good here.

One of the main problems is not knowing exactly what to cover. I’m in up to my neck in transgender-related terms and discussions every day, which makes it difficult to know exactly what other people know and don’t know. I think we have a good beginner’s guide to transgender things, though, and I really hope that we don’t go too far over people’s heads.

It’s been pretty chaotic planning this thing, though. We came up with the first activity pretty quickly, then decided on an hour and a half for the running time, and then laid out a basic framework with four panelists, thinking that we had two weeks. Then we realized that we had one week, a one hour running time, and a panelist that wasn’t responding to e-mails asking to meet up to discuss the event.

But now our event is pretty well fleshed-out, the panelist finally met with us, and now all we can do is wait for Sunday night.

Note to self: Next time you want to plan an event like this, do it more than a week beforehand.

For me, educating is one of the most important things I can do to “help the cause”. I like explaining gender and sexuality (particularly as they pertain to me, but also the basic Non-Heterosexual/Non-Cisgender 101), I don’t get offended when people ask me questions, and I just really enjoy teaching people about this stuff.

I attended a Gender Identity workshop and a Safe Zones workshop the other day, and having somebody else educate people (and me) was almost surreal. She was a cool person, funny and engaging, and I liked her a lot. She is gay, and the perspective she had on LGB issues was interesting and insightful.

She is also cisgender, however, and that makes it difficult for her to fully understand trans* concepts. I’m not saying that cisgender people can’t be good allies or can’t really get the lives of trans* people – actually, I am kind of saying the latter. Cis people can’t really get the lives of trans* people, just as the opposite holds true. And that makes it harder to teach other (mostly cis) people.

She didn’t do a bad job. I rather enjoyed the Gender Identity workshop. However, there were a few problems with the way she set it up. Firstly, she didn’t introduce the word “cisgender”,  just “transgender” and “transsexual”. This seemed very othering to me; though I’m sure she didn’t do it on purpose, it reeked of, “These people need a label because they’re different, and we don’t need a label because we’re normal.” That didn’t really sit well with me.

She also never mentioned that trans men are real men and that trans women are real women. This may seem trivial, but to a room of people who haven’t thought much about trans* people, stating this clearly would be really helpful.

The other main thing I had a problem with was how the matter of cis privilege was handled. She only mentioned briefly the horrors of being trans* in a cis privileged world – however, we spent quite a while on how privilege negatively affects the privileged.

This really bothered me. Discussing how privilege negatively affects everyone, even the privileged, is fine. But to focus almost completely on that? No. Privilege exists, and it puts other people at an extreme disadvantage. Being unprivileged in terms of gender identity is not something to gloss over, especially while talking to a room of mostly cisgender people who don’t really know what trans* people live through because of their lack of privilege.

I did like the woman who ran the workshops. She was nice, funny, knowledgeable, and a good ally. She explained things well and was engaging. Those two things just didn’t sit well with me, and it seemed to me that her being cisgender had a lot to do with it.

I think that if someone wants to educate people like this, that’s fantastic. But they should also ensure that they are fair to all people being represented, and aren’t inadvertently exerting any privilege.

Lobsterfest

Juniata College has this tradition called Lobsterfest each fall in which every club on campus can get a table and sign people up. A few friends and I put together a club called Trans* Parachute United, and this was our first Lobsterfest. Basically, this meant that I got to sit on the quad at a table by myself for three hours in the hot sun while people walked past and gave me weird looks.

Now I had wanted to look as androgynous as possible, which would normally mean wearing my binder (a shirt-type-thing that kind of squishes the developed breast tissue and pushes it away from normal boob area to achieve a flatter/more “masculine” chest) along with a button-down shirt. It was, unfortunately, far too hot for that. It was way too hot even for the t-shirt and jeans I was wearing. And, since you may not know, wearing a binder when you’re sweaty results in prolonged feelings of stickiness and grossness and general discomfort.

But while I was sitting in gross discomfort at the T*PU table, I had a paper in front of me with the Gender Diamond on it.

On the top of the paper, I wrote “Where are you on the gender diamond?” (I had also replaced “Polygender” with “Other Gender” and “Genderless” with “Agender” in fitting with my personal definitions) and had a Sharpie next to it. I labeled my own gender right at the very bottom point and encouraged everyone who came up to me to label theirs as well. I am friends with many of the people that put themselves on the diamond, and have had gender-related conversations with most of them, but there were still some really interesting things I noticed.

1. Almost everyone hesitated at putting down a point, often changing their mind at the last minute before placing a dot
2. Even people who said, “I am definitely cis” didn’t place themselves at the extreme point of their birth-assigned gender (except for one)

Point two is especially interesting to me. These people did place their dots, for the most part, within the circle I would consider cisgender, but several fell closer to the purple center than I expected. This isn’t to say that I doubt that such people aren’t cisgender – if they say they’re cis, and that’s what they identify as, then that’s their decision. I was just a little intrigued by the cisgender people placing themselves closer to the purple than I would have initially guessed. I certainly expected more dots on the feminine and masculine corners than were there.

I also thought it was interesting that people who never seemed to question their gender before hesitated greatly before finally placing their dot.

Overall, it was a good day. A bunch of people came over to the table for information. Most of them wandered off giving me strange looks, but a few people looked honestly interested. I’m glad that we’re around to get the word out and help educate people. If we want to get anything accomplished, we need to make sure everyone knows we exist.

(Eventually people will know what neutrois means… Eventually. XD)